Written at some point back in April. It started with me going back home to spend vacation with my family. It was to celebrate my mother’s 60th birthday and retirement. I only managed to spend a couple weeks because I encountered a few bumps a week prior. Only 2 weeks and then I had to… Continue reading Midlife Crisis
I came across a YouTube short by someone who says that people are just undisciplined, not tired. I let it play over and over again, trying to understand what this person was trying to say, while I rot in bed absolutely exhausted from the past 2 days that I was working 12-hour shifts. I used… Continue reading Burned Out
Offline, I’m constantly daydreaming. At home doing chores, lying in bed, at work typing out what I’ve done for my clients. It’s not just normal daydreaming like wanting to go to other places, meeting other people or simple things. No. I actually have full-blown stories running through my mind. It is either fantasizing about impossible… Continue reading Maladaptive Daydreaming
Most days I wake up One the wrong side of the bed. Anxiety rises And fills me with darkest dread I’d lay back down, Try to go back to sleep, Attempt to escape emotions, Struggle in their solid grip There are some people who’d point out All the bad that they see. Will never think… Continue reading June 11, 2020
Ends by dawn, starts again by dusk. More days like this and she just might combust. She is always awake at night, questioning her sanity And thinking of different ways to ease her anxiety. When she arrives at work, she proceeds to the computer Not to check if it functions, no. She’s not that much… Continue reading A Nurse’s Anxiety (inc) | June 19, 2020
I was happy for the past two months, energetic even, buy it’s beginning to wear down, and I’m slowly going back to my old dark cave again.
I turned 23 years old yesterday and you know how I spent my birthday? I was at a city 50 kilometers away from home the whole afternoon just to renew my license ID. I didn’t expect the line to be that long and the process actually only took an hour out of the almost 5… Continue reading A Year Older | 23
“When are you going to inquire about taking the exams?” “Did you know that there’s a great offer for nurses in Saudi?” “Ask from you cousin. He’ll surely help you.” Those are the things I hear nowadays from my aunt and parents. They have been wanting me to get out there and live my life… Continue reading Pressured // Journal no. 2
When she decided to swallow fear and sent them a message asking how things were with them while they were still online, she wasn’t expecting anything. So why was she hurt when they didn’t reply? It was because 5 minutes after it was successfully forwarded, they logged out. It was because they never replied, even… Continue reading The Feeling of Unwanted
The day was gloomy and so was my mood. I sat on the couch facing the window, listening to rain hitting against the house’s exterior, looking at my phone while I curled up in my blanket for warmth. I returned back to the timeline from reading an article when the page loaded. The buffering stopped… Continue reading Day 5 | Loneliness of an Introvert| Daily Writing
Internal Monologues 