I wake up, rays of sun blinding me as I pry my eyes open. I feel fine sand against my bare hands and feet as I stand up. Waves of water crash somewhere nearby.

This must be a dream, I thought. I don’t remember being at the beach from my latest memory; I was in my room, writing something as I felt my breath restricted and my heart slowly being crushed.

A waiver, I thought, to not attempt to resuscitate me just in case I pass.

There is no longer pain in my chest, although I feel my heart sinking of the realization that I might be in the after life.

Although it wasn’t something that I could’ve imagined.

I am standing on a pile of sand on a rocky cliff overlooking an enormous wall of water extending to the sky, large groups of droplet falling down and returning back to the barrier in an endless loop, never ceasing.

“Welcome, my child,” a deep voice speaks from behind. I turn around and see a lion walking towards me.

“A-are you–” although I didn’t need to ask, because I know exactly who this is.

He nodded in confirmation. “You have done so much in your life, my dear, in spite of your short life.”

I hang my head in embarrassment. “I believe I haven’t.”

“You might think of the things that you wanted to do, but you have achieved many that had satisfied your needs and the needs of others.”

I haven’t thought so much about that. I was only doing what I think were supposed to be done.

“Where are we?” I ask.

“You already know the answer to that, my child.”

I become quite for a while.

“Is still there a possibility that I could go back?”

“Yes, but it’s your choice if you want to, or you feel you need to.”

“But if I choose to go to your country, could I ever–”

He shakes his head. “The situation you are in now is the matter of life and death, and you are currently in between, and you have to choose which way will you go. Once you have chosen, you can never go back.”

“So does it mean that–”

“Your body is still fighting for survival somewhere in your world. As you spend your time here in the in between, it will become weaker but it will stay alive physically.”

“And if I choose your country–”

He looks at me sadly, passing an unspoken message that I immediately understand. “I’m giving you now your time, child. Speak what you wish to be done.”

I pondered over letting myself free from all the pain and suffering that my body is experiencing now. But then, there are people who might be extremely pained, stressed and sorrowed about my current situation: my parents, grandfather, brothers, sister.

And there are still many things that I could do with my life. And many people who might need a hand.

I meditate for a while and, finally, straighten my posture.

“I want to go home.”

He smiles at me. “Then going home, you will be.” He positions beside me and says “Do you trust me?”

I am a little unsure, but I confidently say yes.

He faces the wall of water and gives out a roar. Part of the water moves forward and forms into a spout a few feet below us, and I instantly know what I am about to do.

I position myself at the edge of the cliff and face Aslan one last time as I shut my eyes close and let myself fall back. I heard him roar once more, then I black out as I feel the splash.

I immediately wake up somewhere bright, my whole body slightly numb, my back drenched in sweat, mask around my nose and mouth as air is being pushed through.

I hear someone shouting my name and saying soothing words. Tiredness washes over and I smile at the nurses.

“May I sleep?” I ask. Some of them laugh, some of them sigh with relief.

One of them says something about me being stable and I could already be forwarded somewhere. I look at my mother peeping around the medical team with tears in her eyes before I let drowsiness take over and put me to sleep, thinking that I made the right choice, and the mind blanks out from worries that I used to have.